I drove myself out of insanity...by d.t. emerson
Is reality bugging you? Well, maybe you just can't see it; neither can I, at least most of the time. I have learned that I can control it, however, in very small ways; but, does that not necessarily imply that I can control it in big ways?
Driving could be such a calm event yet, for many, it is an outlet for aggression. Overwhelmed by a pressing need to be somewhere in order to get some thing drivers often find themselves hurrying. They act in ways they would never consider unless armed with 1500 pounds of steel, rubber and fiberglass wrapped around them. Often they are talking about some thing while driving to some other thing, and thinking of yet another thing. Armed with tiny communication devices pressed to their ear, they swerve in an out of traffic focused only on their strong desire to get to the stuff they want as quickly as possible. Perhaps, their imminent death is always at the back of their minds as they hurry to and fro attempting to get as many activities in before their end is at hand.
How often have you glanced into your rear view mirror to see an anxious, aggressive, and overwrought person within two feet of your bumper? It used to drive me mad. I was very clever, armed with evasive maneuvers to eliminate hostile tailgaters.
Lagging, Evasive Maneuver 1: Let off gas and go five to ten miles per hour slower. This is a passive aggressive type action which served to infuriate the already wicked person behind me and gratified my ancient instinct for revenge. This would often cause a surge of adrenaline.
Intermittent Braking, Evasive Maneuver 2: This method might well cause both parties to get a boil with adrenaline as it is much like a game of cat vs. mouse or chicken. I would randomly, softly apply the brakes creating an illusion of slowing down without actually doing so. This is very effective at causing great amounts of anxiety to both drivers involved in a tailgating dogfight.
Fake Brakes, Evasive Maneuver 3: This action requires old type manual headlights that can be turned on and off and only works during daylight hours. Flipping on the lights would turn on the back, tail lights simulating to the unknowing tailgater that you are slowing down.
Hard Braking, Evasive Maneuver 4: This is the most dangerous method and, for that reason, the most effective. This is how we teach the person behind us that it is not safe to follow someone this closely at a high rate of speed. I have heard of someone who applied this technique so perfectly that they were rear-ended, totaling their own car—instant Karma. One would only want to use the hard braking technique when they are ready to have an accident and, perhaps, kill someone.
Often driving to work became a teaser for the workday itself. I could arrive as if I had just finished the first round of a prize fight unscathed and seething with anger and wallowing in the energy of the fight side of the fight or flight response. Assume that many have experienced this on their way to work. Even the most timid of your coworkers are very brave when it comes to road rage. You might find yourself surrounded by donut eating, furious people who have just finished one round of the workday battle royal, i.e. getting to work. Don't dare press their buttons.
Having realized that I am an alien to this planet, I started trying to cease getting involved in tailgating/ sparring matches. Why? I suppose we have this illusion that aggression is a bad thing and it might well be a good practice to reduce the amount of friction in our daily life. As a rule us aliens like small steps better than big ones. So, instead of giving up driving, I decided to try to make in a more pleasurable experience.
Somewhere I had read or saw someone addressing the topic of road rage. It may well have been Dr. Wayne Dyer as I have found it quite helpful to heed some of the advice from his books in the past. The source suggested that when one finds themselves in a potential road rage situation to simply take a deep breath and repeat in their mind, “everything is calm and peaceful...everything is calm and peaceful”. So, I started to apply this mantra while driving. I thought up a twist on the calming affirmation: I would lean back in my driver's seat and very calmly lay my right arm across the passenger seat. To someone driving so close that they could hear my radio, it might appear that I was oblivious to them. I started to consider how dogs can sense your fear, and your anger. As a lifetime owner of dogs, I know this to be true. I thought perhaps if I exude a cloud of calm around my vehicle it might well touch the person behind me. Or, they might decide that since their aggression was being ignored, they might attempt to just pass me at the earliest opportunity.
The method wasn't working too well at first. This, I surmised, was because the sense of calm I was attempting to create with the affirmation (“everything is calm and peaceful”) was simply a band-aid covering my festering anger-sore. The anger that had for years emerged at the moment I noticed someone close to my rear bumper was still simmering just below my false affirmations of calm. I was still being tailgated. But, in the spirit of true effort and a commitment to change, I also gave up on the evasive maneuvers mentioned above. There is something to be said for good, old-fashioned perseverance.
d.t. emerson
After weeks of effort, I started to notice a change in what was happening to me on the road. People would tailgate me for a short time then quickly pass or even sometimes just back off! It was starting to work? My driving time was altogether different; it was no longer a source of anger and frustration but a time of calm. When not glaring into the tiny rectangle of the rear-view mirror there was time to see clouds, trees, and birds outside the windshield.
Now, I almost never get tailgated; and I wonder if it is my changed perception of driving, or something perceptible that I am projecting outwards that other drivers unknowingly sense, or...does it really matter what it is? I've change the way I see the world, or the way the world I create behaves. If it can be done on this small scale, imagine the possibilities. Start small.
Driving could be such a calm event yet, for many, it is an outlet for aggression. Overwhelmed by a pressing need to be somewhere in order to get some thing drivers often find themselves hurrying. They act in ways they would never consider unless armed with 1500 pounds of steel, rubber and fiberglass wrapped around them. Often they are talking about some thing while driving to some other thing, and thinking of yet another thing. Armed with tiny communication devices pressed to their ear, they swerve in an out of traffic focused only on their strong desire to get to the stuff they want as quickly as possible. Perhaps, their imminent death is always at the back of their minds as they hurry to and fro attempting to get as many activities in before their end is at hand.
How often have you glanced into your rear view mirror to see an anxious, aggressive, and overwrought person within two feet of your bumper? It used to drive me mad. I was very clever, armed with evasive maneuvers to eliminate hostile tailgaters.
Lagging, Evasive Maneuver 1: Let off gas and go five to ten miles per hour slower. This is a passive aggressive type action which served to infuriate the already wicked person behind me and gratified my ancient instinct for revenge. This would often cause a surge of adrenaline.
Intermittent Braking, Evasive Maneuver 2: This method might well cause both parties to get a boil with adrenaline as it is much like a game of cat vs. mouse or chicken. I would randomly, softly apply the brakes creating an illusion of slowing down without actually doing so. This is very effective at causing great amounts of anxiety to both drivers involved in a tailgating dogfight.
Fake Brakes, Evasive Maneuver 3: This action requires old type manual headlights that can be turned on and off and only works during daylight hours. Flipping on the lights would turn on the back, tail lights simulating to the unknowing tailgater that you are slowing down.
Hard Braking, Evasive Maneuver 4: This is the most dangerous method and, for that reason, the most effective. This is how we teach the person behind us that it is not safe to follow someone this closely at a high rate of speed. I have heard of someone who applied this technique so perfectly that they were rear-ended, totaling their own car—instant Karma. One would only want to use the hard braking technique when they are ready to have an accident and, perhaps, kill someone.
Often driving to work became a teaser for the workday itself. I could arrive as if I had just finished the first round of a prize fight unscathed and seething with anger and wallowing in the energy of the fight side of the fight or flight response. Assume that many have experienced this on their way to work. Even the most timid of your coworkers are very brave when it comes to road rage. You might find yourself surrounded by donut eating, furious people who have just finished one round of the workday battle royal, i.e. getting to work. Don't dare press their buttons.
Having realized that I am an alien to this planet, I started trying to cease getting involved in tailgating/ sparring matches. Why? I suppose we have this illusion that aggression is a bad thing and it might well be a good practice to reduce the amount of friction in our daily life. As a rule us aliens like small steps better than big ones. So, instead of giving up driving, I decided to try to make in a more pleasurable experience.
Somewhere I had read or saw someone addressing the topic of road rage. It may well have been Dr. Wayne Dyer as I have found it quite helpful to heed some of the advice from his books in the past. The source suggested that when one finds themselves in a potential road rage situation to simply take a deep breath and repeat in their mind, “everything is calm and peaceful...everything is calm and peaceful”. So, I started to apply this mantra while driving. I thought up a twist on the calming affirmation: I would lean back in my driver's seat and very calmly lay my right arm across the passenger seat. To someone driving so close that they could hear my radio, it might appear that I was oblivious to them. I started to consider how dogs can sense your fear, and your anger. As a lifetime owner of dogs, I know this to be true. I thought perhaps if I exude a cloud of calm around my vehicle it might well touch the person behind me. Or, they might decide that since their aggression was being ignored, they might attempt to just pass me at the earliest opportunity.
The method wasn't working too well at first. This, I surmised, was because the sense of calm I was attempting to create with the affirmation (“everything is calm and peaceful”) was simply a band-aid covering my festering anger-sore. The anger that had for years emerged at the moment I noticed someone close to my rear bumper was still simmering just below my false affirmations of calm. I was still being tailgated. But, in the spirit of true effort and a commitment to change, I also gave up on the evasive maneuvers mentioned above. There is something to be said for good, old-fashioned perseverance.
d.t. emerson
After weeks of effort, I started to notice a change in what was happening to me on the road. People would tailgate me for a short time then quickly pass or even sometimes just back off! It was starting to work? My driving time was altogether different; it was no longer a source of anger and frustration but a time of calm. When not glaring into the tiny rectangle of the rear-view mirror there was time to see clouds, trees, and birds outside the windshield.
Now, I almost never get tailgated; and I wonder if it is my changed perception of driving, or something perceptible that I am projecting outwards that other drivers unknowingly sense, or...does it really matter what it is? I've change the way I see the world, or the way the world I create behaves. If it can be done on this small scale, imagine the possibilities. Start small.
posted by The Apocalypse Times at
8:14 PM
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